Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
