Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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