Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.

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(314): View more from Missouri

Someone's got a whale tail

(1-314): View more from Missouri

A thong is hangin out?

(314): View more from Missouri

No, a fatty following them

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(212): View more from New York

I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for

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(912): View more from Georgia

I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.

(678): View more from Georgia

I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home

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(417): View more from Missouri

apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?

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(928): View more from Arizona

Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say

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(919): View more from North Carolina

He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached

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