the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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