I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
