I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
