I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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