I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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