shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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