what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
