I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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