party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
