I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
