I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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