Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Everclear isn't food dammit
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
