All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
