I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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