five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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