alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
