So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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