As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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