yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
