My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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