i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize