i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
