would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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