Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
i now understand why vodka
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
