upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
