i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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