Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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