The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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