My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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