if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
