i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
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