I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
