OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
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