sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
