On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
