how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
