I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize