if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I need to sanitize my soul.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
