real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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