oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize