Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
