How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
