Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
