How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
