im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
