I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
