Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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