Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize